


Never Let Go

by mathildia



Series: Neverland Adventures [2]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV), Peter Pan (1953), Peter Pan - J. M. Barrie
Genre: Bondage, Breathplay, Captain Pan, Cunnilingus, F/M, Hurt/Hurt, M/M, Memory Loss, Neverland, Not Underage, Oral Sex, Past Abuse, Reluctant Submission, Trades, because peter pan, non con, sub killian, tinkerhook
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-07
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-20 07:35:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16551650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mathildia/pseuds/mathildia
Summary: Hook's been to Neverland before, of course. He knows he shouldn't ever have come back here, but he can't remember exactly why.Tinkerbell knows exactly why.Pan.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a loose sequel to [Lost and Found](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1766395) but you don’t need to read that first. So long as you believe that when Hook was in Neverland working for Pan, Pan did some terrible things to him and also that Hook and Tinkerbell had a thing.
> 
> *Clap your hands if you believe.*

Hook’s alone the first time Pan slides out of the jungle. He’s been waiting for it. 

“It’s very nice of you to come back and see me, Captain,” Pan says, voice bright and piercing as a gull’s cry.

 _But just a boy_. Hook squares up to him and adjusts his stance, cocking a hip, “What can I say, I’m a nice person.”

Pan grins. Plain and friendly, almost _flirtatious_ , Hook thinks, then wonders if he’s imagining it. If he wants it. If he wants this boy-faced demon to flirt with him. He wants to be wanted, of course, always does. But he’s a survivor, and his sense of danger prickles here. “Nice?” says the demon. “Oh, you really are not.”He takes a step closer, “but don’t fret about that. I like that. However, that’s not the interesting part is it?”

“I can assure you, I am _all_ interesting parts.” He says this with a swagger in his voice, but he knows that swagger sounds faker than usual.

Pan is closer now, close enough to touch and he does. He reaches out. One pale arm, long white fingers, Hook’s jaw. “You really, you really don’t remember do you?”

There is something dreadful and familiar about that touch. “I have to confess,” he says, jaw working in Pan’s smooth grip, “I don’t have many recollections of my time here. That is the nature of this cursed island.”

“Isn’t it? But let me tell you something, Captain, one little hint about our history together in this place. A small memory jogger. If you remembered anything about your last visit, you would have set yourself on fire before you ever returned to my power.”He closes the small distance between their bodies. Pan’s chest is pressing onto Hook’s and Hook is suddenly  _panting_ with desire. “Don’t you remember, baby?” Pan coos, “I  _ruined_  you.”

A breath in his ear, “Should I do it again?”

And he’s gone.

Hook’s hard in his breeches as he slumps back against a tree, chest heaving, blood roaring. 

High in the trees: laughter. 

*

They’ve been in the jungles of Neverland for days, perhaps a whole week. The smell of the place, the hot damp greenery prickles at his memories, but little more. He’s been here before, he knows that. As a young man he lost his brother here, met that demon, that much is clear enough, but of that second visit he remembers little, only that he had been lucky to escape, only that he should never return.

But he has returned.

Back at camp he keeps himself away from the others. Easy enough, as they barely tolerate him. Being royal and magical and on a mission. He’s just the transportation. He knows it. No one asks why he’s so quiet or where he was earlier. After they eat he lays himself out a little way from the camp.

He expects to dream of the demon.

A fire, boys dancing, whooping, Pan playing his pipes, others drumming. He is watching, standing with his back to a tree. Tied, he’s tied to the tree, ropes biting at his waist and thighs. Wrists tied behind him. Another rope coiled around his neck, tight enough to keep his breathing shallow. He’s naked and his dick is hard, tight to his belly. He aches everywhere, aches to see that demon.

He’s desperate for it when Pan comes dancing from the press of bodies and the clouds of smoke. Pan is bare chested, licked by fire and shining with sweat. He stops a few feet away and stares at Hook, shoulders heaving. And all Hook wants is for that beautiful demon to kiss him, but the ropes hold him so tight. He moans, struggling. Pan grins and takes a step nearer. He rests an arm on the tree next to Hook’s head and pauses with his face a whisper from Hook’s own mouth.

Pan’s tongue flicks out once, caresses Hook’s shaking lips. Hook moans again and when Pan doesn’t move close enough, he half chokes himself on the rope at his neck, trying to kiss him.

He wakes with a jolt, with a memory of someone.

*

A fairy, he tells them. Someone he used to know when he was here. Perhaps she’d be able to help them.

_Perhaps she’d be able to help him._

When he sees Tinkerbell for the first time he feels a rush of cold. Like a memory but it’s empty. Nothing there but a name, “Lady Bell.”

He sees her swallow as she nods a bitter greeting.

He doesn’t leave with the others. He’ll stick around a little bit, for old times. He says this with a dogged wink. They think he intends to seduce her. He lets them. 

Perhaps he will. The truth is he doesn’t know what he intends.

She has his back to him when he returns to the clearing. She doesn’t turn as she says, “What are you doing here, pirate? Why did you ever come back here?”

He doesn’t reply for a moment. Then says. “Lady, truly, I don’t know.”

And when she finally turns to face him, she has tears in her eyes. “Why are you so _stupid_?” Her shoulders are heaving with rage. “After what I did to get you off this island.” She stamps a dainty foot. “How could you, you stupid pirate.” Her hands are balled into little fists. “You stupid, stupid pirate.”

“What,” he says with a cautious swallow, “what _did_ you do? Tink, I don’t remember any of it. What happened?”

“Well that explains why you’re not running, screaming mad into the ocean, I suppose. Have you seen him? I wouldn’t know. He never speaks to me these days. He tired of me in the end.”

“I saw him. I don’t know what he meant by what he said to me. But, first, please, I do know you, Lady. I know you well, don’t I?”

Tinkerbell’s face seems to break then, a wave of emotion that changes her face from something hard and angry into something so soft and desperate. “Oh, you are so stupid,” she rushes to him, right into his arms and they close around her. It feels right. And then, before he knows it, she is kissing him over and over, kissing him and crying and he kisses her back. She tastes like honey. Just that. Almost too sweet, and he realises with a sharp shock that her cunt tastes just the same, and he knows that for sure. He wants to throw her down on the forest floor, rip off her tiny green dress with his teeth, make her scream for him, like he knows she has before.

He’s about to breathe this idea into her hair, already hard at the thought, already anticipating her bright laugh and greedy agreement, when she cups his chin, looks into his eyes and says, tears glittering at her lashes, “Oh pirate, he once told me if you ever came back he’d fuck you to death in front of me.”

“What?” Hook freezes, heart cold. “I doubt that, Lady,” he says, falling back on brashness as ever. “I have protection.”

“Do you?” she looks amused. “Protection against him?”

“Witches,” he says, wondering if they would even think to protect him.

“How many witches?”

“Two.”

“Two. Oh pirate.” She rubs his bottom lip with her thumb and her face is full of sad affection.

“And a Dark One,” he adds, knowing he has no protection there. If he really was going to get fucked to death The Crocodile would gleefully watch.

“Pirate,” Tink shakes her head and he hears a sound like distant bells. “It’s so familiar he feels like something is pulling at his heart “You’re a fucking dead man.” She holds his gaze and cocks her head onto one side, smiling sweetly. “But as you are here and since I did such a great thing to rescue you, which you have now wasted because you are very stupid, before Pan gets hold of you again, you’d better fuck me one last time.”

Hook looks at her for a moment, then grins back, because what else is there? “You know I don’t remember much, but I do remember how sweet you taste, Lady.”

In a slip of movement, she gets down on the ground, skirt shoved up around her waist, as she reaches for him, fists in his lapels. Pulling him down to plaster his mouth to hers for a long soft moment before she’s pushing him down, past her belly until his face is between her legs and she is open there, sweet and sticky like ripe fruit. Her little hips wriggle against the dirt. He pushes out his tongue and tastes her, one inquisitive prod. It is met with a squeal of delight and a rush of liquid over his tongue that tastes just like he remembers and with it another memory.

Pan is dragging him into the circle of chanting, drumming lost boys. His hands are still tied. He is being help down in the dirt. He’s still naked. So used to being naked he barely notices. Pan laughs and kicks him in the ribs. He can hear them all laughing, but he doesn’t care. All he wants is to be near Pan. Desperate to avoid more kicks and mockery he rolls over and curls around Pans leg, finding his boot and licking at it, looking up at his master with desperate eyes. Pan laughs, shakes him off and kicks him again. “Behave yourself, dog,” he snaps. “You’ll lick my boots when you’ve begged for it.”

And Hook moans. He feels Tinks thighs tighten around him, lifts his face, shifts his weight and shoves his dick into her. He’s hard, blinding hard from that memory and it sickens him. Being mocked, scrambling, begging to lick that demon’s boot, being called a dog, kicked like a dog. And he doesn’t understand why but when he thinks of that, he comes so hard it’s like he’s falling through space.


	2. Chapter 2

One night lost in the jungle, he dreams he’s drowning, tipped over board in a storm, dragged down by mermaids, their thick cold tails wrapping around him. Deeper her goes and under the sea are monsters. Thick tentacles wrap around his wrists and ankles pulling out, spread like a starfish. He panics and fights. In the dark. He cannot see or breath. There is no air. He sucks in water and chokes and coughs and wakes. 

Pan is sitting on his chest.

He gasps out again, for real this time. Still he cannot breathe. He tries to raise an arm to push Pan off him and finds each of his wrists held by thin vines, stretching him out and pinning him to the ground. “What the hell is this?” He thrashes underneath Pan, but it doesn’t help and his vision is going cloudy when Pan shifts enough that he can suck in air.

Pan is smiling in the dark jungle, lit by fireflies and the glow of strange plants. He looks beautiful. A ghost in the dark. A weight on his body crushing out his life.

Hook chokes in another breath and snarls as soon as he can speak. “What do you want?”

Pan cocks a head in exaggerated thought. “I was just wondering, Captain, if you remembered our first time?”

“I remember nothing of being your prisoner,” Hook presses out. His breath is still ragged, Pan’s still making fight for each breath.

“Oh I don’t mean that, silly pirate. I mean the very first time. You, back then, with your eager pink cheeks,” says Pan, pinching one in sly fingers. “Rather like now.”

Hook gasped. Pan seemed to be getting heavier, like an iron band tightening around his chest.

“So innocent. Beautiful in your way. That uniform. So many buttons. Each one shiny and done up so tight.” Tell me, Pan puts a hand around Hook’s throat, “was it tight?”

Hook can’t answer, Pan is squeezing, gently crushing his neck and he has no breath. He balls his fists, tears at the vines that hold him, but they’re so tight and magically strong.

When Pan let’s him go, he’s half sobbing. “Please. What do want? Do you mean to kill me.”

“I mean to do something to you. You like this. I suppose that’s another thing you choose to forget. But I know what you haven’t forgotten.” Pan snaps his fingers and the vines pull tighter, so tight he feels a burn under his arms as they’re stretched and pulled. 

“Enough. Free me, demon,” Hook yelps.

The vines stop. Pan drops; lowers his cheek to Hook’s, slides into position so they are face to face and dick to dick. Pan is hard. 

So is Hook.

“You haven’t forgotten,” Pan whispers, mouth so close his teeth are grazing his ear, “you haven’t forgotten kneeling in the dirt with your dying brother in your arms, begging me to help you, promising you anything.”

“Don’t” Hook presses between his teeth.

“The brother you were so desperate to impress, the brother who loved codes and rules and observance of both, with him in your arms you made all kind of filthy promises to me. Things he’d have been horrified to hear on your proud lips. He didn’t know did he? He never knew what you were. You leant forward and you,”

“Please,” Hook whimpers, but it won’t help. He knew what had happened. He had been desperate.

“You opened my breeches with you mouth, something you’d clearly done before and you took me right down your throat.” Pan drops each work into Hook’s ear like a sweetmeat. “Do you remember?”

“Of course,” Hook snaps back. “Liam was dying. Of course I fucking remember.”

“Mmm-hmm,” Peter coos, licking over Hook’s ear. “I think I was right to let you onto the island to find that plant, don’t you?”

Hook snaps his head around to look at Pan. “You led us to the Dreamshade so you’d be able to bargain with me for my brother’s life? Just so you could use me?”

Pan blinks. “Actually, No. I wanted rather more than a reluctant blow job, shockingly. I led you to the Dreamshade so I could create _you_. So I could create this.” he touches Hook’s stubbled cheek, “from that creature that washed up on my chores. So I could make myself a perfect monster.”

“What. You didn’t make me. No one made me. I made myself.”

“What I truly love about Dreamshade,” Pan says, lifting an arm between them and covering Hook’s mouth with a wider splayed hand, “isn’t just what it does to it’s victim. Dreamshade poisons everything it touches. Dreamshade slipped into your brother’s veins, but it slipped into your _soul_.

Pan lets his hand slide up so his hand cover’s Hook’s nose too, sealing it with a pinch. “And now here you are. So intoxicating. No wonder I burn so much to kill you. You’re the only one I never grew tired of you know. I tired of Tink. Of the Wendy Bird. The only one that never bored me was you. Do you like that, you’re special.”

Pan takes his hand from Hook’s face and Hook sucks in a hard a desperate breath. His gasping struggles causing Pan to gasp a single, “Oh.’ and he feels the demon grinding his crotch againstHook’s own. Hook takes a second sweet breath and with it comes, a memory. 

“You wanted to burn me,” he says, remembering a little of his last hours in Neverland.

“Oh,” Pan licks at Hooks lips. “I would have saved you, plucked you from those flames as you lost consciousness, flown you up to an Eagle’s nest and nursed you like a babe until you were whole again.”

Pan traces a line down over Hook’s chin. Hook shudders as those long fingers lightly circle his throat again. “I might still do that. Keep you prisoner on a ledge so high you cannot move for fear of falling to your death.”

“I’d thrown myself off,”

“The reckless bravery. Why is it so intoxicating?” Still teasing his throat Pan slides a finger into Hook’s mouth. Hook lets him, let’s it move over his tongue. Pan watches, eyes lust-lidded. 

For a long time there is no other movement, no sound for the jungle.

Pan break the spell with a sharp whoop as he pulls his finger away and slaps Hook’s face. Snapping himself upright, back atop Hooks stretched out body. “Seems like someone is desperate to suck a dick,” he says. He hold hooks jaw, squeezes his face and seems close to stopping Hook’s mouth again when Hook says, “Why is Tink still here?”

“Why do you care about that?” Pan snaps, a shade of hurt in his voice. “You still stupid enough to claim to love a fairy.”

“You said you had got bored of her. If you are bored of her, why can’t she leave?”

“How could she leave?”

“Fly.”

Pan stares at him, smiling so, so sweetly. Hook thinks of seeing Tink, fucking her down on the jungle earth. She’d been different. _How?_

“What happened,” Hook says with a slow swallow, “what happened to her wings?”

Pan grins savagely. “You,” he spits. “You’ve been wondering, haven’t you, how you finally got off this island. That stupid insect gave her wings to me. To save you. So you could leave. It thought it loved you. You know it’s brain is the size of a grain of sand.” He laughs brightly, then his face grows sour. “Take a deep breath now Captain. It might be your last.”

He moves his hand and stops Hook breathing.

Hook’s eyes stretch wide. He tries to thrash under Pan but he can’t move. Pan's breathing hard, rocking his hips with pleasure as Hook struggles under him. Helpless. Suffocating. 

The world grows grey. The demon really meant to kill him this time. He thrashes harder but the thin vines around his wrists grow tighter and tighter.

“Oh yes” Pan sighs, you look so good when you are frightened. Oh god yes.” The demon jerks his hips hard. Hook feels a wetness, a sour smell in the air. Darkness rolls over him.

And then Pan is gone. Hands and vines and all.

Hook runs his hand over his face, breathing in the dark.

**Author's Note:**

> https://mathildia.tumblr.com/


End file.
